Hot cross buns
Before I was a mother I heard this sentence a lot, but I never truly listened to it, nor did I know what stands behind it. Only a parent can understand that and I don't mean to sound patronizing.
If you are reading this and you are not a parent then there are a few things to stop and appreciate before you are going to have them. The most important, the one that us parents miss the most, is freedom. Being spontaneous has left our vocabulary long time ago, somewhere between having contractions and putting the first diaper.
I took freedom for granted and it slapped me in the face.
This post is not about me being ungrateful for being a parent, because it's not the case at all, but it's a post about longing for a little piece of the old me, the one who could go wherever, whenever, at under any circumstances, just because she wanted. And she didn't even know she wanted, it was just so obvious.
This week we went for a couple of nights to Köln. It was the first time we went as a family on holiday and the excitement was big. We had so much fun.
But it strike me again how much my life has changed and how, even after 3 years, I didn't get used to it.
The whole trip had to be about keeping the little guy content, entertained, fed and rested. I mean, sure, I do that on a regular basis, but now, on holiday, I wanted to do other things. I wanted to go to museums, I wanted to go out in the evening, I wanted to just go around the city and absorb it.
Instead I got to see the zoo, to drive in a cable car, eat junk food and go to bed early, but it was so much fun. A different kind of fun, and I know that as years go by I will have the kind of holidays and trips that I want, and then I will miss him being a kid so much and miss our time as a whole family.
Life is so complicated. Sigh.
25g fresh yeast
60ml agave syrup
25g soft butterzest of 1/2 lemon
1/4tsp ginger powder
pinch of nutmeg
For the egg brush:
1 egg yolk
Add the egg, agave syrup, butter, lemon zest and spices. knead for about 2 minutes, then add the salt. Knead for 3 minutes and at the end add the raisins. cover the bowl with a damp towel and let the dough rise for an hour in a warm place.
After an hour knock the dough back and divide the dough into equal pieces. I made 13 buns which each weighed 72g.
Shape into nice balls and put them on 2 baking trays with baking paper. Leave enough space between them to rise.
Cover them with a damp towel and let them rise for another hour.
Preheat the oven to 200C or 190C if you are using fan.
The normal hot cross buns have icing on them to create the cross, which I obviously wanted to avoid because of the sugar, so I buttered a sharp knife and cut a cross on top of each bun. It's important to do this slowly, otherwise all the air will go out of the bun and it will be flat again. It's also important to butter the knife from both his sides before every cross, because the butter (or any fat for that matter) keeps the dough from coming together again and sticking.
Mix the egg yolk and water and brush the top of the buns.
Put the buns in the oven and bake for 7 minutes, rotate the trays and bake for approximately 5 more minutes.
The bottom of the buns should be light brown and the top golden.